For a long time, I thought it was the right thing to do to keep track of every penny I spent. I read a lot of books about personal finance, downloaded apps, and even tried keeping track of my spending in a small notebook.
I became obsessed with getting things right. I always knew where every dollar went, how much I had left, and if I was "on track." At first, it felt like it gave me power. I finally figured out how I spend money.
I knew how much I spent on food, rent, transportation, and even those sneaky little things like gum or in-app payments. But after a few months, something strange happened. I was getting tired, both physically and mentally. Every time I bought something, I had to do maths in my head.
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If a $6 smoothie pushed me over my "food" category by just a few dollars, I felt like I had failed morally. It started out as a way to raise awareness, but over time it became a way to make people feel guilty. I wasn't just planning my money anymore, I was obsessed.
Every week, I would spend an hour going over my expenses, changing categories, and wondering why things weren't perfectly balanced. Even though I was keeping track of everything, I wasn't saving much more. I wasn't getting rich. I wasn't having fun with money. I was just feeling stressed.
Then, one weekend, while I was out shopping for groceries, I stood in the aisle and thought about whether or not to buy a $3 jar of almond butter that wasn't on my list. I was thinking too much about a $3 item, not because I couldn't afford it, but because I didn't want to mess up my spreadsheet.
That was the moment when everything changed for me. I realised that the system I had made made me more anxious, not better. So I quit. Cold turkey. I stopped keeping track of things by deleting the apps, closing the spreadsheets, and taking a break. At first, it felt like I was throwing away everything I had worked for.
But something strange happened: I didn't go off the deep end. I didn't go crazy. To be honest, I felt better. My money didn't go bad. I got better at spending mindfully, not because I was keeping track of every penny, but because I was finally paying attention in a new way.
I stopped keeping track of every single transaction and instead used a big-picture strategy that let me be free without causing chaos. At the beginning of every month, I put a set amount of money into a different checking account that I only used for spending.
That was my "lifestyle" account, which I used to pay for things like groceries, coffee, clothes, and eating out. I called it my "monthly flow." I stopped micromanaging once the money was in that account. I didn't care what I bought with it as long as I stayed within it.
No groups. No receipts. Only one clean limit. What gave this power was that it was like real life. Some months I spent more on food, while other months I bought books or went on a day trip. The total stayed the same, but the flexibility changed.
I still paid my bills and saved money, but I didn't have to explain what every dollar was for anymore. This method taught me something I didn't know before: keeping track of every penny doesn't mean being exact with your money. It's all about being aware. Also, knowing about your habits is not the same as letting them control you.
I still check my accounts every week, but it only takes five minutes instead of fifty. I check my balance, make sure I'm within my spending limits, and then I move on. The peace it brings is worth a lot more than the fact that I spent $4.23 on a croissant last Wednesday. It's interesting that my spending habits got better after I stopped keeping track of every little thing.
I was more careful about what I bought because I wasn't keeping track to punish myself; I was managing with purpose. I stopped doing mental gymnastics every time I bought something and started asking better questions, like, "Do I really want this?" Will this make my day better? Am I spending money because I'm bored or for a reason?
The culture around personal finance is full of shame. People think you're careless if you don't keep track of everything. But I think it's important to know when a tool isn't working for you anymore. Keeping track of every penny helped me learn, but it didn't help me live. That was the piece that was missing. My system is easy now.
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Bills and savings happen on their own. I have a limit on how much I can spend on my lifestyle, but not a list of categories. And I check in with myself a lot, not just about money but also about how I feel. When I think money is getting tight, I make changes. I balance my budget the next month if I spend too much the previous month. It's not perfect. It's a person. And it does work.
If you're tired of budgeting, ask yourself: are you still using your system, or is it using you? The point isn't just to keep track of your money; it's to learn about it. And sometimes the best way to do that is to take a step back and give yourself time to trust what you've learnt.
What do you think?
Could you be less precise with your spending and more intentional?
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